Sunday, March 22, 2009
I'm so bored. I'm kinda starting to feel like Alex doesn't want to be with me as much as he used to :/ He says he does, but idk it just feels different. Like i know that it feels different after a while but still. Like i want to hangout with him so bad and i feel like he doesn't want to. On Friday we both went to Andrea's birthday party and we weren't together at all. Normally we would be by each other but we weren't at all it kinda sucked. I know he just wanted to be with his friends since he barely ever gets to see them but we dont really see each other that much anymore now that im doing tennis and i always have homework but i dont think he even realizes that we barely see each other or something. Because once we're together for five minutes its like we were never apart. It kinda sucks how like he texts me and says cute things and then he sounds all happy on the phone but once he comes over hes not that happy. I really think that i dont make him happy anymore. I can understand though because im a horrible girlfriend. I expect way too much im always worrying about everything and im just always a bitch. Im never gonna find anyone else who will actually put up with all my stupid shit. Idk i think im just over reacting hes probably happy and does wanna be with me but i freak out about everything. I wish i could be different in a good way.
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Don't worry! I worry all the time and maybe it is ok that your not seeing each other every day like you were before because then you'll have even more fun when you do get to hang out. Just try to think that your excited for the next time you will see him instead of being sad about the times you can't see him! You ventured out and joined a team of doing something you love and you are so young and you should do things like that, so try and think of the positive things that will come out of not seenig him everyday! It always pays off in the end! I'll see you in a couple days! I LOVE YOU!
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